I remember speaking to one of my friends the other day, trying to convince her on the merits of documenting her year. For someone who has never written a review, I sure had a lot to say. Looking back to that conversation, I realised that I might as well use my advice on the matter. However, I was still hesitant for two reasons. The first being my unreadiness to confront certain truths about my year. The second — well because writing is hard. To write is to be exact; and as you can imagine, this exercise of using words to give exactness to my thoughts is not an activity I consider a labour of love [hoping to fix this in 2022].
But you see road trips are potent instruments of catharsis. On this six-hour trip to a new city, with trees for views, and a piano playlist for meditation, I had some time to reflect on these past months and aggregate my experience into paragraphs that have been curated mostly by hindsight.
Here we go
On autonomy
In 2021, I moved to England to pursue a degree in Computer Science. Leaving Nigeria came with a mix of feelings: I was leaving family and friends, to study a different discipline, in a strange land, in peak winter, during a pandemic! But I was also excited about the promise of opportunities that lay on the other side. Completing a degree in a pandemic meant physical classes were replaced with virtual classes which meant I did not have to leave my apartment unless I absolutely had to. I adapted very quickly to this development and optimized my schedule accordingly. A side benefit to virtual schooling, as I soon came to realise, is how guilt-free it was to exit lectures at the slightest inconvenience. The frequency of my exits will not be discussed here of course [my sponsors fit dey read this review. tenks].
Last year, I also appreciated the level of control I had over my time and decisions. My days were filled with activities I genuinely wanted to perform. My sleeping schedule was mine to modulate. On a whim, I could decide to subsist exclusively on red grapes one day, fast on the second day, and cheat with a pack of wafers on the third. No second guesses; just willpower and vibes. And boy did I love every bit of this privilege. Alhamdulillah. You experience this brand of autonomy and you don’t want to go back. It’s a phase I wish more people experienced and one I wholly recommend
On job hunting
The objective was simple: secure a job in time for graduation. I had received prior wisdom on the need to apply to jobs from Day 1 and that’s exactly what I set out to do. After applying to a grand total of 142 jobs across financial services, asset management, networking, technology consulting, and several product-based companies, I can confirm that this was one of the most challenging endeavours I have ever had to undertake. When you apply to this many jobs, you get comfortable with rejections very quickly. However, the reality is that rejections hurt, the pain being inversely proportional to one’s proximity to the offer before the rug was pulled. You think of the promise of said offer, you regret the premature ideations of you working on the new team in a prime office space somewhere in central London, and most especially, you blame yourself for the time you do not get back. But if last year taught me anything, it helped me to appreciate the importance of a solid support system. Because so many times, I’d come back home broken from a rejection; and in conversations with my people, I would find the strength to go again. Bolaji and Wahab always had ample supply of just the right words. Deji also probably got two rejections that day so it was often wiser to turn our misery to banter. Whatever happened, I was deeply comforted with the certainty that if I ever needed strength, it was usually one conversation away.
For most of the year, I felt like a full-time job seeker doing a degree on the side. My weeks were defined both by coursework deliverables and by the number of scheduled interviews. And it certainly did not help that I had promised my parents a distinction from the degree (in fairness, I did want a distinction too). The pressure was total, the rejections steady and motivation was finite.
A few rejections later, I finally got my ‘Yes’ and the rest, as they say, is history.
On friendships
Owing to my many battles, my strategy last year was to consolidate my existing relationships with little interest in expanding my circle. In fact, I may have avoided meeting new people because I feared they’d offer friendships I would be unable to service. Most of my year was characterised by social media breaks to get some more productivity out of my days. Having said that, I tried my best to show up for my friends. I am excited to announce that many of them got their first job offers, began side hustles, moved to new countries, switched careers, applied to scholarships, while others found love, got married and 10x’d their current incomes. I am super excited for and proud of all of them and I hope that things get even better for them this year.
On books
While I was only able to complete 7 books this year, I am very grateful for some of the titles that came my way.
They offered beautiful perspective on investments, personal development, modern philosophy and helped me escape my current reality more times than I would like to acknowledge. Through these books, I got to visit Japan, Barcelona, England, and Lagos. I certainly hope to read more books in 2022, and, by consequence, visit more cities. So help me God
On love
this section is intentionally left blank :)). Let’s circle back to this next year
On becoming a tech bro
To be honest, I am quite excited to start this role. I have put quite a lot of work into my craft, and I am delighted things are finally coming together. It is not lost on me just how much there is to learn, but I need to remind myself to breathe, take it all in, and proceed one step at a time. I have come some way and I am pretty enthusiastic as to the next steps. I hope that when I take stock of 2022 this time next year, I speak from a place of proven growth, and some more skin in the game. 😊
On personal learnings
I learnt several things this year:
A mindset of abundance is critical to sustained growth
Kindness is a universal currency
Strive for competence over passion
Strive for consistency over intensity
Rejections are a part of life. At the end of the day, you need just one “yes”.
You accept the love you think you deserve — Stephen Chbosky
Actions have consequences.
On (tentative) resolutions
I’d like to achieve the following this year:
Have a better relationship with words. Write them. Read them. Speak them
Be more present in my friendships and relationships
Hack recursive thinking and master implementation of recursive data structures and algorithms
On gratitude
2021 was a heck of a year on all fronts but I am thankful to God, family, and friends. This year, I asked a lot from people and I am grateful that when it mattered, people showed up for me. I owe so much to so many
Gratitude to God for infinite mercies this year. Alhamdulillah rabbil alameen.
Mum and Dad — for making all of this possible. For the sacrifices and the unwavering support through the years.
Bolaji and Wahab — Words are not enough. You were here every step of the way. I pray for ease and khayr in all your doings.
Bisola, Abeni & Hom Boi — Literally couldn’t have asked for a better family.
Deji — Omo. E plenty. Cheers to a brotherhood forged with the bellows of adversity. Super excited for how far you’ve come man. Can’t wait for you to tell your story.
Sahib, Jone & Usman — Classmates turned brothers. So glad we all made it.
Zaii, Maryam, Aminah, Folayan, Zainab, Folawiyo, Anu, Rosemary, Kolapo, Yewande, Abdirizak — For checking in, for stopping by. And for the wins recorded this year. May 2022 be better
Samuel, Mori, Mowa & Dominic — for showing up however many times I called.
Sensei Aliyah for the gifts of Khalil Gibran and Elif Shafak. Thank youu
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And to everyone that added colour, homour and depth to my 2021, you have my total gratitude.
2022. Pls, be nice. Let’s do this
Originally published on Medium